BEGINNINGS and Metanoia Ministries
- Equipping the Church
and empowering people on the journey toward sexual and relational wholeness.
Together we are finding Freedom in Christ.
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BEGINNINGS and Metanoia Ministries
- Equipping the Church |
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Journey Gems The sins of others that take on the form of neglect often set us up for isolation and loneliness that may result later on in overly dependent relationships. We try to make others the mother or father we never had, or at least didn't get enough of. Such loneliness can also create a vacuum for sexual problems like addiction to pornography and compulsive masturbation. In the absence of real sources of love, we bond to false ones. A lack of love tempts us to secure love out of the "false self." Rejection from others means that we received this message: "you are unacceptable." This can come from our families, our schools and churches, and our peer group. We accumulate labels and experiences that tell us we are not worthy of love. People sin against us by demeaning who we are, even cursing us! And we start believing that lie. Similar to rejection is abuse. Abuse involves a misuse of power. It can be emotional, physical, or sexual. In sexual abuse, an adult breaks into a child's world and destroys its innocence. The child's view of sex and intimacy becomes distorted. Fear and shame result for some; the one abusive man or woman can lead the victim of abuse to perceive the threat of abuse from all men or all women. This can lead to homosexual options (for example, a woman seeking refuge in the non-violating arms of another woman), or a complete shutdown of one's sexuality. The sins against us - neglect, rejection, and abuse - can readily empower the false self and its efforts to secure love falsely. We need Jesus here - the author and finisher of our true selves. He calls us to Himself, that He would bear the sins against us and their effects. Jesus is uniquely qualified to bear our wounds. Prior to His crucifixion, Jesus faced severe cruelty. His disciples neglected and ultimately rejected Him in His time of greatest need. As St. Francis exclaimed in sorrowful meditation upon His death: "Love was not loved!" He was mocked, slapped, spit on, and whipped, then died a slow and agonizing death on the cross while continuing to endure public humiliation. Through His life of suffering, Jesus grants us Himself as an advocate for the wounded. Jesus bears our wounds. His work on the cross assures us that we have a place to go with those "grave clothes." And as with our personal sin, He calls us to enlist the service of others to help identify and unwrap whatever those "clothes" may be. In presence of others, He empowers the true self to name and release to Him the deadly offering. He then bears the sin. Some steps in this process include:
Excerpt taken from Crosscurrent™ curriculum from Desert Stream Ministries by Andrew Comiskey. Back to Articles | Back to Resources
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